If ‘socialization’ isn’t THE number one question about homeschooling, I don’t know what is.
Public schooling has been the norm for so long, doing outside of the norm might ‘screw up’ the kids. Might make them…weird. Maybe they will become hermits. Never leave the house. After all, it says it in the phrase– ‘home schooling’ – the kids will be home. So, can they really get ‘socialized’?
A little over a year ago, I took my children out of public school while they were part-way through elementary school. I was nervous about my decision, and I talk about the things I learned in that first year here. But despite public opinion, the one thing I wasn’t worried about was whether or not they would be ‘socialized’. Here’s why:
1. ‘Socialization’ isn’t something that is suddenly learned once a child is in the public school setting.
People are not robots. Children are not robots. A child begins to socialize long before the entree of the public school system. Social skills are supposed to develop naturally, typically beginning in the home as infants and continue as they grow.
The public school setting is just one PLACE a child may be with other children while they continue to develop these skills. But this is by far and large NOT the only – or for a growing number – the best environment to hone and develop these skills. It could be at any number of other places with diverse children of all ages and adults, developing these social skills. Public school is just ONE setting among many.
2. Public schools are now measured by test scores, not by social skill aptitude.
With the pressure that teachers and districts face with meeting and beating test scores, it’s no wonder that the teaching focus is largely on common core standards. While there is merit in meeting these academics standards and the intent is good, the pressure on faculty and the schooling community shifts the learning equation completely.
Learning has become more about keeping the town highly regarded with test scores and state funding and there is less time for inspiring, value-modeling, play and you got…true socialization. There simply is not enough time in the day for all those ‘extras’ like there once was.
Teachers try like hell to do it – because teachers, by and large, are just about the best people there are – but they are under unreasonable expectations and their hands are tied. The jobs they still are able to do is remarkable, given the amount of pressure they are under.
But, with all that schools are expected to do…they have eliminated much of recess time. The time when kids play and socialize. Class time is for consuming information for better test scores with as little interruptions as possible.
How is that the optimal environment for developing social skills?
3. Homeschool Co-ops provide social time, diverse academic opportunities, shared resources, and peer support for parents.
There are home school co-ops for different types of families, first falling within one of two categories – religious-based or secular. Co-ops can be a great setting for a lot of families once they find the right one that works for their family. Here’s one place to check out groups all over the place.
Co-ops share their resources, often having parents teaching classes, or sometimes hiring outside experts. Parents are often on-site while children learn, sharing resources and ideas with one another. Many are structured with meaningful breaks between classes for social time, but the schedules are all determined by the members of the co-op – the families.
Co-ops are typically a very supportive and nurturing environment where lots of discoveries are made. This past year, one of my children developed a deep appreciation for world history and political science – something I never saw coming! Another became interested in American Sign Language and STEM science competitions! Both developed friendships with individuals of different backgrounds and ages through these conversational-style study groups and substantial playtime breaks in between. I was able to learn about different homeschooling approaches and resources.
And even better news – if one co-op doesn’t seem to be the right social or academic fit for a homeschooling family, there are enough other co-op or other homeschooling social activities to choose from. You’re not stuck with just one based on where you live.
4. Other homeschooling clubs are all over the place to nurture your child’s unique interests.
I think kids should be outside a lot. I think nature is GOOD. And I also think kids should develop an appreciation for the natural world – but that’s MY style. So, I checked things out and guess what I found? A homeschooling nature club that hikes regularly. It was perfect! The kids and the leader go out and discover the world around them, and then write about their discoveries.
And a nature club isn’t the ONLY thing out there – there’s LOTS of meet up, clubs and groups with special interests for homeschoolers. This just happened to be the one that worked for us. Beautiful things happen while getting inspired by nature, learning about biology and writing in their nature journals. While comparing and discussing their discoveries with the other 11 children in the club, do you know what is happening?….You guessed it. They are socializing! And it’s NOT robotic…it’s a natural process and it’s being honed in the most ordinary, normal way.
5. Speech clubs and mock trials are big in the homeschooling world.
I know this kind of falls under number four, but I think it’s important enough to list it separately. Homeschooled families tend to be rather…communicative. An overarching theme in the homeschooling community is to teach how to communicate and discuss topics well. It comes up often, in all sorts of ways – through co-op discussions, study group planning, and in the popularity of speech and debate clubs .
6. Towns and school districts still offer extracurricular activities – and they aren’t all just for the public school students.
Towns and their recreation departments often have sport offerings and other extra-curricular activities for reasonable prices that are available to residents. Additionally, school districts often allow homeschooled children to participate in their own extra-curricular activities, like sports and music. This can be an easy and fun way to keep homeschooled kids integrated in their hometown. If a school district has a policy against this, it’s not the end of the world – I’ve know of policies that have changed. Homeschool numbers are only increasing and these families still pay municipal taxes where they have successfully challenged these policies. Regardless, there are so many activities in the growing world of homeschooling to choose from, it’s sometimes more about making sure that you don’t choose too many!
It really comes down to this: Are we holding the public school system as the gold standard for teaching our children socialization?
Look around. Do you think kids socialize and communicate well? Is it because of the public school system?
Do you think that’s the ONLY way?
I don’t.
